Making Peace With Money

Sunni Chapman
8 min readSep 8, 2019

If you’ve been around awhile you’ll have heard me say that your relationship with money is like any other relationship, which means it needs continual love and attention and the willingness to work through whatever crap that comes up that’s in the way of that love, right?

But HOW on earth can you have a good relationship with money when it’s not at all SAFE to love it?? When it seems, and you’ve been taught, that is flat out WRONG? And not only is it wrong, it is BAD. And not only is it BAD, it makes you someone who is essentially “sick in the heart”.

That’s the real crux of it. We’ve learned from all manner of stories, tv, movies, cartoons, books and from hearing the messages in our families and our world that loving or caring about money makes you sick in the heart. It makes you bad. A bad, misguided person.

Just try saying “I love money” out loud. When you say it, check in with your body and tell me how much did you cringe on a scale of 1–10? 1 being “I love money and I’m totally cool with it, my body didn’t even flinch” and 10 being “I’m not even gonna say that out loud, that is disgusting and I am disgusting for even thinking it, and I fully expect the hand of god to smite me down for even reading this article!!

If you fell anywhere in that spectrum between a 2 and a 10, then it clearly does not feel safe for you to love money. And that is getting in the way of you having more money and feeling SAFE IN YOUR LIFE.

We believe it is not safe to love money — or rather, to ADMIT we love money — because we believe that not loving it is the stronghold… that it’s the safeguard that will keep us from becoming a misguided, rotten, greedy, horrible, awful soul.

We believe (because we were taught) that it is important to keep this shame to keep us safe from becoming a monster. We’ve been taught money is bad and makes people bad, so we must hold it at arms length. We must maintain our distance from it, ignore it, turn a blind eye to it, and also try to get more of it at the same time in order to live.

Talk about a F-ing mind F#@%!

How on earth could you cultivate a safe, mutually supportive feeling relationship with money in your life when you are carrying all of this baggage?

Sunni Chapman

Writer, creator & mentor. I help people make more money doing more of what they truly love.